Friday, November 16, 2007

With the As out of the way, I finally have time to visit The Onion again. It's a great faux news site.

Case in point, this article.

Also,

MySpace Outage Leaves Millions Friendless

"I've just been wandering in and out of my cubicle in a daze, not knowing what to say and who to talk to," said Upper Darby, PA data-entry technician Patrick "Smiley457" Mancuso, 31. "I thought about asking someone at work or in my apartment building if they'd join my friend group. But how am I supposed to tell which ones I will like and which ones I won't? It's too overwhelming."

"Without an 'About Me' section, I've lost all sense of self," said Imbrescia, 17, who depends on the site to convey his innermost thoughts to millions of extended-network friends. "Do I want kids? How tall am I? What's my body type? These are questions I can't answer anymore.

Self-Help Lecture Attendees Surprised To Hear Speaker Was Once Just Like Them

"I figured I'd never have anything in common with such a confident go-getter, but then he said he used to be unhappy and unmotivated, and I thought, 'That sounds exactly like me!'" "The only logical conclusion is that if I do everything this man tells me, I will find the same success he found," said Dwyer. "I'm going to start today!"

Ah, satire.